You are Important
Have you ever wanted to do something but just didn't believe in yourself?
For most of us the answer to this is "yes," and for those of you who haven't felt that way, tell me your secret.
I know for myself the thought "I'm not good enough" comes up a lot. That record has been playing for far too long. You would think that the record would be scratched or broken but no it's as good as new, sounds a bit daunting, is there an end to this feeling? Where is that light at the end of the tunnel?
It sounds cheesy, but it's within you. You must be thinking; "OK, Andria how do I tap into this and if it were here why haven't I before?". Well most of us get clouded with comparisons, and our ego comes knocking, that voice inside us who fills us with so much self-doubt. I don't have all the answers for everyone but...
Here are a few of steps that have helped me.
I can not begin to stress the importance of this. Creating a safe and welcoming place for you to hang your hat, is key! You WANT to come home at the end of the day. Now I know many of us think we need to have money to do this but doing simple things like ambient lighting, playing calm music, and lighting a candle is sometimes all you need.
What are some things that you do to create a safe and inviting space?
Family, friends, and co-workers. You name it, if they are not serving you, they're toxic.
What I mean by this is that if you don't feel rejuvenated, nurtured, inspired, loved, uplifted, it's not a healthy relationship. Now, I know sometimes people are not always going to feel amazing, and they are entitled to have bad days but if it becomes a trend and you feel exhausted, emotional abused, or upset in your relationship, something isn't right.
Reevaluate who is in your life. It doesn't mean they are bad people but perhaps not a good fit for you. Remember "You are important!" and if you are choosing to stay in relationship with this person ask yourself "how is it serving me?", Because if you are deciding to remain in relationship, there must be a payoff in there for you. Stay curious.
Connecting to Mother Nature
The Japanese call this "Shinrin-Yoku," forest bathing. I can't count how many time's that when I have been down a simple walk in the woods or sitting by a body of water has changed that. I feel connected to myself and at peace within. I treat this as a mindful meditation. Taking in the sounds of the tree's rustling in the wind. The ocean crashing into the shore. The sound of birds chirping around me. That's my nirvana.
I use to think that the only one who was allowed to have mantras were the Dali Lama, monks, and yogis. Man, was I wrong. My whole world felt like it opened up. My current mantra is "trusting in the yes," to me this means being curious of the unknown and stepping out of my comfort zone. I am challenging the "I'm not good enough," self-talk that I have gotten so use to using.
I tend to quickly say "no" when sometimes my heart says yes, it's because I try to keep safe and by doing so I keep my blinders on through life. Do you know what I mean?
Journal or ask for Help
If you are like me, you might have a hard time asking for help. When you do, and you have a great relationship network (see above), then you will be met with open arms. Because "you are important," and those close to you will want to help. You just need to be willing to ask for it. I sometimes want people to read my mind and just know. That's not fair to them because in the end, I am setting them up to fail and for me to be disappointed. Thus we all don't win.
Now sometimes you'll want to ask for help but just need to work through all the obstacles first, or so we tell ourselves. Great, let's bring out the journal. Journalling is very therapeutic and can help you work through things or at least have a clearer mind. I know some people think that you have to write pages and pages but I sometimes just doodle, write a couple of sentences, or just scribble. Whatever you are feeling is perfectly imperfect.
These are a few things that I know have worked for me.
What are some steps that help you get through those hard moments?
Starting a blog is me "trusting in the yes" and trying something new, putting myself out there, and hopefully through this bringing connection. You have to count those small wins!
If you found this post useful, this Sunday, November 20th, 2016 I will be giving a webinar, "you are important", 2 PM Pacific Time, where I will be diving further into guides for you to bring out your self-importance.
To register follow this link here:
Peace and love.